toozopia and swimsuit wedgies

We watched Zootopia. Ruby always calls it Toozopia. 

Last night as I went to floss Siri's teeth, she said her gums hurt. as she opened her mouth it was obvious her tooth was infected. Today we went to the dentist and she left with one less tooth. She did great and didn't have any pain.  Hoping it heals as normal.

Last night Ruby told me that if the medicine doesn't work she will die. "I don't want to die. I want to stay here with you". Are you kidding me? Don't say that Ruby! Why are you saying that?  I was so sad. I talked to her about how we don't know, and that we will all die, and we all get to be together in heaven. And it will all be ok.  I think Siri told her.  I quickly went to Siri's room and asked her. She denied it, but either way, I told her not to talk about it with Ruby. She's too young to understand it all and is scared, and we don't know what will happen. Tuesday night after we put the girls to bed, Siri came out and handed this note to Mark. We read it together before we went to bed. We were both just sobbing. Siri is tender. Love her. 
This is hard.

I have felt better about getting out and seeing people.  I needed some time to understand what the scan means, but I feel better. I had some emails back and forth with Dr Holly to openly talk about what I didn't want to talk about when we were at the hospital Tuesday.  I don't want it to consume every conversation though, or at least not the sad parts. There are so many reasons we have to be grateful right now.  Ruby hasn't suffered any side effects yet, she didn't have to do chemo/radiation. She is still herself. We get to be at home, close to her hospital. We are surrounded and being carried by family, friends, and neighbors-thank you people! Having Mark being self employed means he doesn't get any paid time off, but he has flexibility to be with us just about whenever we need. 

Speaking of Mark. Months ago I was talking about 'best case scenario' or the 'biggest blessing'. He asked what that would be and I said for the drug to work. He asked "Would that really be the biggest blessing?"  I was speechless. I'd never considered that. I appreciate that he had. Ever since then, I have had so much more trust in God's plan of whatever lie ahead. No, of course we don't want Ruby to pass on so soon. But I acknowledge our view, minds and understanding are so limited. 

“Have we not great reason to rejoice?” How blessed we are if we recognize God’s handiwork in the marvelous tapestry of life. Gratitude to our Father in Heaven broadens our perception and clears our vision. It inspires humility and fosters empathy toward our fellowmen and all of God’s creation." Dieter F. Uchtdorf.

I am so happy to have the families Mark and I do. I love our siblings. Families are the best. Thank you.

See y'all tomorrow morning. The weather should be nice and mild. It's going to be amazing.

The stripe suits Jane and Ruby are wearing are darling. They also give Ruby a wedgie easily.

 I love it :)

thanks Liz o for watching the turkeys while I looked at cars w Matt

this morning. usually she slowly opens the door while I'm in bed reading and comes and lays by me. Lasts about 1 minute until she get bored and goes to look for Mark.