Sunday, December 29, 2019

goal aim growth progress habit change transform ambition

 I love the topic of personal growth. I love the endless potential we each have...and its all in us already. We just have to find it :)

Today I shared a few thoughts regarding physical goals as one of 4 areas of goal making our church has asked us, specifically the youth (ages 8-18), to participate in.

I loved having the thoughts and purpose, the why of physical goals, floating around my mind as I went about this past week.  I haven't yet made any solid new goals for 2020, but I'd like to. The words that stuck out to me during our church meeting most was when someone said to ask. Ask God "What am I lacking?" to help us guide our goals. Then he followed with, "If you don't get any answers, just ask your wife. She'll be able to tell you". It was so funny.  But really, the advice of asking is what I feel like I need. There is SO. MUCH. INFORMATION. in the world. There is no end to the ways I want to change and improve, especially how to go about it, and that can be overwhelming. So to ask, and think about, what I want to do next.

Here were a few of my favorite gospel related quotes I came across as I studied this week.





     We are most commonly attacked by doubt, fear, indecision, hesitancy, etc first with our thoughts. How important it is for us to be the boss of our thoughts! I often, and easily, get switched over to auto pilot in all things. I'm so thankful for what I've learned thus far, and what I will learn, about changing myself and reaching goals. I have words, goals, quotes...directions to my brain, hung around the house and in my room. I need all the reminders I can get!  

    I have also been reading through my older journals. A few pages stuck out to me from 3 years ago.  Annie was just a couple weeks old, on oxygen. I was recovering from a c-section. Ruby was sick (throwing up and fever). The washer was broken. Mark was out of town. The minute he came back I handed him a bottle and I took Ruby to the ER (because you do that when you fever and have a port). I was worried about this being our last Christmas all together...anyway you get the gist. I was exhausted, in all regards of life. I am SO thankful for all of you who were able to help us. I couldn't do everything and I will always be grateful for you. Taking care of the girls, cleaning our house, bringing meals. I love you.

Thursday, October 10, 2019

Autmn and chilly

This morning was a stay-home-and-make-myself-get-things-done morning. Annie and I are often out the door somewhere in the morning, but today we stuck around. And really, I didn't want to go anywhere or do anything. Changed light bulbs, getting things in and out of storage, and took time for a walk around the block. Annie kept begging to go to brother Dallon's house. Frank Dallon is in his late 80's, and lives around the corner from us. To Annie, brother Dallon=dum dum sucker :)  So, we went. Delicious came wafting out his front door, so we went it and had a few bites with him while he chatted and ate his breakfast. I write about this to remind myself how much I love spending time with older people and hearing about other peoples lives, their stories.

It's sunny and chilly today and I'm thankful we've had a good bout of fall weather. The past two to three days I've had immense gratitude for my life and health. A neighbor and her 2 boys were hit by a car, an old friend and co-worker facing invasive cancer for the second time with a wife and 3 little girls. Another family friend, father of 4, diagnosed. Awareness of war and reality of refugees. And also struggles right here in my own immediate home. Its a balance between focus here as a mom, and looking out across the street and across the globe to find where I fit in and how I can help. Sometimes we need to narrow our focus to what's in front of us. Sometimes better to get out and about.

Saigon with Mark, a fav place we like to go out to together

Annie put me down for a "naptime"

Filming day with reps from Roche. 
Great to share our life, home and story (but tiring too!)



Allll the cabin fun this summer. We went every chance we got!

That one time Siri got sick, and then sicker, and didn't do anything for 3 days straight.
Pneumonia.

But she got better in time for her birthday!

Jane loooves to play!

this is often where you'll find Siri

Our visit to San Fran to speak at the Genentech conference 
and a quick day with Aunt Jenn!




Annie's new BFFs from the neighborhood

Hospital dayzzzz are usually long, lots of crafts and drawing.
PET/CT coming up Oct 16th

We like CoreLife too. And then I go home and bake a treat ;)

Happy Birthday Liz!

Our hosting of the 3rd annual Tortellini (the name of our street) pie night!
...there were about twice as many pies as pictured nom nom nom

yard work. then more yard work.

hike to Bells

Stonehaven Dental (where Mark works, and the dentists we see) do a free movie night every 6 months. The girls loved the show. 

Student of the month!

I love getting cavities filled!-said no one ever

You know when you just feel depressed, on the verge of crying, and don't want to do anything, blah.
This trip to the Quarry trail helped me get my head out of a funk and it worked.

Jenn Kate came with other Cali friends for General Conference!

Hi girls. I love you.

Love family dinners at Grandma's

Got to visit my friend in town and these 3 kiddos could have 
sat with this puppy at Wheeler Farm alllll day.

Lessons from Brother Dallon


Siri makes stuff like this just for fun. I love her brain.

Monday, September 2, 2019

Still here!

I wonder how many times I've thought to blog and just didn't make time for it. A lot!  Journaling with pen and paper, writing, blogging...whatever form it is, I like it. I like keeping record, I like looking back. I like dumping my thoughts to make room for new ones. I got a major concussion in college and I can't help but wonder if that doesn't play a role in my lack of memory. 

It's Labor Day and Mark and I have been working around the house and yard all morning, its been awesome!  I went for a mellow bike ride while I listened to an audio book, "Where the Crawdads Sing". It was recommended to me and I wanted to read it before we went to North Carolina in July but it didn't come available through the library until now. Because of the holiday it was nice and quiet on the roads, more people out than cars. 

We've had an amazing summer-full of good things. The girls are back at the elementary school. They were worried about being behind in some things and what do you know-they're not, but are ahead in many things. Homeschool mom money in the bank. I'm so thankful for the courage I had to homeschool last year. It was a process and often times uncomfortable. But it has forever changed who we are, how I think, and my perspective on many things. 

Mark and I have stepped up our vision of what goals we want to happen. The feeling of accomplishment is priceless and I love the endless possibilities. I've worked hard on my health since being in a big ol slump since earlier this year. I was gaining weight fast, feeling terrible about myself, not knowing what doctors to trust or talk to regarding thyroid issues. I'm seeing an internal medicine dr, and have taken time to feed myself only good things and its made all the difference. I'm not bouncing off the walls with energy, but I'm feeling better.   We've spent a lot of time, sweat, and money improving the front yard and now hoping to clean up the back to make way for new projects (we're on 1/2 acre so there's always work to be done!). 

The girls are growing up quick.  I did try to potty train Annie earlier this summer but put her back in diapers (which saved my sanity). Ruby's days of first grade are long for her so far, but she doesn't complain much and is outside playing as soon as she gets home. We've been invited to to take part in a video for the company that makes the drug she's on, as well as talk at a conference regarding our experience in a couple weeks.  I'm thankful for the opportunities we have to share. I've recently gone back through journals and pictures. I read a book about the psychology of post traumatic stress and growth which has been insightful and helped as I piece the past together. Ruby still takes her magic cancer fighting pill every morning and hospital visits every 4 weeks.  Jane and Siri have started up soccer again. They love their teams. Siri is still a read-a-holic. Jane prefers to be out going going going. 

Mark continues to love marketing and photography, both of which he amazes me by his talents and ability to improve and learn. He reads a crazy amount of books and is always trying to get better. After about 5 years as the Young Men's President over our congregation at church, he got a new calling as the Ward Mission Leader. I'm going to be teaching a Wednesday morning cycle class at Vasa and look forward to having that time to challenge myself. Putting myself in front of people, with a mic on, with music and movement I've made up, sometimes makes me incredibly nervous. I almost always end up loving it and being able to share energy. Once a month I teach the 11, 12, 13 year old Sunday School class and love this new age so I get a feel for what is coming my way...Siri will be 11 this month!

Thank you to all you wonderful family and friends who help us along our way-with your friendship, help with kids, yard stuff, all of it!

finally got all of us camping!
(Tanners Flat)


fun visit from cousin Kate!

Annie is sad "the boys"  (our neighbors) recently moved

Ruby has been obsessed with the chicks who've made 
our backyard their home this past week.

I went to an awesome self development conference last week!
Time on my own, away from my usual house/kids routine was so good for me.

September!

First day back to school. 
They're adorable.

cabin time!

fun Primary's Oncology family party
(minus the part where Mark took a fevering Annie home early)

annual visit to Ocean Ice

Jane did a very cool Jr.Firerighter camp


love love love the 24th of July gathering at Joan's

getting reading for a horseback riding lesson

Mark and I loved being part of youth conference


Another dream come true for me-to visit North Carolina. All 6 of us went! 
We got to participate with Lighthouse Family Retreat....AMAZING people and organization.





more cabin time on the 4th!

Siri and her friend made some mulah with their super snacks

Bear Lake Van Dorn family reunion
Cold but beautiful!



Ruby was brave a spent 5 days at Camp Magical Moments in Idaho.
She can't wait to go back-another incredible organization with generous volunteers.

Homemade pizza is always a good idea.

Camp Hobe

Ruby did swim team this summer! 
It was very informal, but got her in the pool and moving every morning.

Siri and Jane spent a week at Camp Hobe.
So proud of them for being away from home all week and doing great!

Those Thackeray siblings are the.best.

Biztown with homeschool friends was so fun!

She got her bunny and named him Handsome

Went to Colorado over Memorial weekend to visit 
one of our favorite families on the face of this earth.


Annie's  phone skills. 
So many pictures of grass and the bottom of cupboards on my phone.

Life is good.